31 December 2009

A Very Happy New Year!! Or,to my Welsh cousins...Mae Blwyddyn Newydd Dda!!

New Year Countdown - New Year Layouts

Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow.
Albert Einstein

A very Happy New Year to you all...
...See you in 2010...

30 December 2009

When fate hands you a lemon, make lemonade...That SUCKS!!!

Yes, I am officially missing my funny bone (or any funny place to be fair) at present.

So, OK, here I was, blissfully enjoying my *sabbatical* from work, after 28 years of hard graft, through marriage, 5 pregnancies, births, 3 months off with each baby, divorce (OK, just the usual stuff all of us mums go through in life)...

Then this year, a lovely, very large lump (oh, the irony of that word!!) sum of early severance which paid off ALL our combined debts (yes, really, nothing, nada, nil) with leftover for me to peruse the job front at a very (read ::very::) leisurely pace.

Then wouldn't you just know it (actually I should have really, shouldn't I?....Duh)....

.....Life goes and serves us a nice BIG, FAT, JUICY lemon!

No, nothing much has really changed from yesterdays post, apart from a rather bizarre meeting today with the lovely, and very esteemed consultant, Prof. M. Thomas at The Royal Marsden Hospital. Bizarre, as at some points I couldn't really tell if he was talking to us or dictating into his little machine, which he kept rewinding midway through sentences to check where he was, then stopping to tell/ask us something, but sort of all at the same time.

At his request, I was pulling all OH's meds out of a carrier bag (I know, how so un-PC and so very trendy of me!..Not!) which happened to be under the very chair he was sitting on, so I was therefore crouched down, in front of him, between his knees, whilst he, still dictating, and looking down at me with bushy, wiggly eyebrows asked "how many?"..click..whiz...."Oh that's rather a lot, 2 a day you say?"..click....whiz...."Monica comma Iliac vessels, posterior, Psoas muscle stop New paragraph"...."does he need to take that many?"(YES! Fuck, he does, you try sleeping next to the person you love while he's quietly whimpering in pain in his sleep!!)...click....whiz...
As I said, rather bizarre! And I think if my funny bone could have been located this would've been the time...

Anyway, the upshot is actually more or less the same, a 7cm tumor. But what we did find out is that it's wrapped around his Iliac vessels. A biopsy was taken (definitely ouch, after all it was only a curtain between us) and the results will be ready next Thursday. But as any operation will also involve a Vascular surgeon, the best of which happens to be away till the beginning of the week after next, OH now has an appointment for the results on the 14th Jan.

So, I'm sort of hoping that the wonderful Prof. Thomas, in his infinite wisdom..click...whiz..., knows that damn recipe for 'Lemonade' because at the moment I sure as hell don't....stop

But of course, all and any recipes for 'that' Lemonade most humbly & gratefully accepted...

:::Shit!... does this post now mean I've moved on from just plain ANGER?...because I just read this back and I don't see very much anger here??!?:::What's the next stage??:::

29 December 2009

A trip I wish we really didn't have to make...S**T!!

Tomorrow OH and I will travel up to London to the Royal Marsden Hospital, for a 2.15pm appointment with a specialist, Prof. Thomas (yup...he has been googled, lots ...he's extremely good)
His previous stay in hospital turned out not to be his appendix, but a 7cm tumor called a soft tissue sarcoma. So, for obvious reasons, I wish we weren't having to make it at all.

There ::breathe out:: I've written it down now....in black & white, all very matter of fact. But believe me, until now, I have been incapable of writing that down without getting so irrationally angry, I physically couldn't write it. I'm not angry because of the time they took to find it, in the great scheme of things, it was only a couple of days of delay and they were completely right not to have operated on him at the time.

But I am just ANGRY. ANGRY. ANGRY!!
The anger hasn't abated or diluted in any way either, which in the normal run of events it does/should. But of course, to be replaced by other emotions.....therein, I do understand, lies the problem.

I know it's not healthy to hold on to so much anger, but I have to. Because I'm too scared not to.

Sorry to be such a party-pooper in this time of celebrations, and I am actually, oddly, sort of OK (well, apart from the anger!). But I just really felt the need to write this down RIGHT NOW, so I went with the flow.

Much love....and I wish you all a very Happy, Healthy New Year.. xxx

24 December 2009

Christmas cheer to one & all...and Peppermint Creams!

I hope all you lovely Bloggers and families have the most wonderful, healthy and very, very happy Christmas and New Year!

I raise a glass to you all, well, maybe not quite yet, as I still have the hoovering to do....and that would make me a tad wobbly whilst welding the Dyson Beast (it's new you know, and I'm thinking I may need to put some bloody L plates on it!)

On a slightly different subject, yesterday TD made her Christmas gifts to Family & friends. As she is a student she is always strapped for cash, so each year she hand makes her pressies. In past years she's made biscuits, this is the first year she's attempted chocolate dipped 'Peppermint Creams'. Now she just needs to wrap them in cellophane & ribbon...and voila!

Here's the recipe as they are so, so easy to make and even the littlest child can make them, its just like playing with playdough, which they can then eat....they'll love it!

Enjoy and let the festivities begin...

18 December 2009

Let it snow..Let it snow..Let it snow..and a SnowKat!

We rarely get snow here in Brighton, nothing that ever sticks anyway, so of course when it does people go all out and fully embrace their inner child....

Here are some slightly festive (festive
only 'cause it's snow) picturey type things...
....including a snowKAT!

I'm spelling it like that because my Gorgeous 18yr old son's girlfriend is called Kat....and they made it on the roof of our house. That's not
quite as dangerous as it may sound! His bedroom is in the loft, with huge loft windows.

But snow does make people do some very odd things. For instance, while it was snowing last night, said 18 yr old son & girlfriend opened the loft window, wide, and videoed themselves, whilst singing "It's snowing
in my bedroom!" which of course it was....He-he...

17 December 2009

Hysterical phone call...And a Paramore ticket!

I received a phone call late this afternoon, while doing some shopping. So, there I was juggling carrier bags, a basket, my handbag & a mobile phone, and all I could hear was an almost incomprehensible hi-pitched,
squeaky TD shrieking....



....all in one breathe....in 3 seconds flat!

S**t, she nearly gave me a bloody heart attack...I thought someone had died or something...
I had to get her to repeat it several times, before I could understand her.

And no, I'm not going to make it any easier for you,
I had to decipher it standing in the middle of a store of full on, rampant christmas shoppers, you're only reading it on a screen! She was so frantic to spurt it all out she didn't even hear me saying "Yes".... "YES"..she was so busy rambling & burbling.... "TD....YES!" I had to shout at her.....Haha.

I had tried (secretly, as a christmas pressie) to buy tickets when they first went on sale a couple of months ago, at 9am, but by 9.08am they were sold out...Woah! Popular or what?? And I refused to pay upward of £80 at any of the other places...it's a £20 ticket for gods sake!

Needless to say I now have one extremely
ecstatic (thankyoumummythankyouthankyouILOVEyou!!!) Teenage Daughter, who is, as I type, queuing in the freezing cold at the Brighton Centre, with her £25 ticket, to see her Idols, Paramore, featuring the lovely 'Hayley Williams' ....

And I know TD will have just the hugest
grin on her face...

Here is a video of Paramore's BBC Radio One Live Lounge performance of their single, just in case you have absolutely no idea who they are, although if you have teens you must, surely?
If you like it, be sure to listen to their acoustic version of Kings of Leon's 'Use somebody'
I think it's a beautiful version of a great song.


(:::Psst!..Sshhh....Just don't tell TD that her Oldest Gorgeous Brother is on the Guest list, VIP....So I think the s**t may hit the fan when they return. Uh-oh....take cover:::)

14 December 2009

Just a photo..Beautiful TD 'I am safe'..

Sorry, but there is just too much crap in my head at the moment to write a long post, or one that would make much sense and isn't just ugly anger and sadness....Not very Christmassy at all....

So instead I thought I would give you my beautiful TD's photo (with her permission).

This is her, a self portrait, holding a badge with the words 'I am safe'....

I love it...

I'll post again soon, when I have the heart to.....

7 December 2009

OK... NOW I'm really P***ed off!

:::WARNING::: Very slight icky medical subject, so if you are of a sensitive nature...
Who the hell am I kidding!...we're all mums, and know all sorts of stuff about peoples insides...WARNING OVER....

My lovely OH is currently in hospital, with an abscess on his appendix (yes this does exist, I'd never heard of it before, but I googled it, and it's there, so therefore it MUST be true!) He's been in constant pain, on his right side/hip, for the last 5-6 weeks (yeah! I know! how long???) has been medicating himself every 4 hours and still going to work! (Ostritch??...hmmpf) After seeing our GP 3 weeks ago, who ordered x-rays and blood tests, he went back for the results the friday before last. He was told all the tests had came back fine, no problems that she could see. Then she suggested an Ultrasound scan of his abdomen, and whipped off a letter of referral, which should take 1-2 weeks to come though..Mmm.. Have since found out, said letter then tells you to phone the number on the letter to
make an appointment...WTF! She did suggest, that if the pain got too bad, to take himself to A & E and he would probably get the scan done there and then.

And I'm sorry, but this is where I'm about to sound very sexist....What is it with some men and health issues? Had it been me, or probably any other woman I know, I would have gone to A & E as soon as I'd got out of the GP's surgery. She more or less, reading between the lines, told him to. As I had gone to the doctors with him, I said this to him. Did he go? Did he limp down there? What do you think?? NO....He waited until the following Wednesday afternoon, where, thankfully, they admitted him to a surgical ward.
By thursday morning he had been given another x-ray and 'the' Ultrasound scan. They also ordered a CT scan for the same thursday afternoon, but then cancelled it as they felt they had enough information already.

IV antibiotics, with a Laparoscopy on Monday (today) to have a look in there, as apparently the main concern appears to be what else the abscess may be attached to. The bowel being the tricky one. But, if they could, they would remove the appendix & abscess while doing the Laparoscopy.

I got a phone call this morning, at 08.45, from my OH saying "I'm booked into theatre for 9.00" then we lost the connection. He called back at 9.15 to say "It's cancelled!"

My thoughts were, oh well, emergencies happen they have to deal with those first, thats life.

Except....the reason given? "We need a bit more information, so are going to give you a CT scan this afternoon"...Gggrr!

What!?? You mean the one they cancelled on Thursday, as they said they had enough info then?

The operation today was cancelled only because they cancelled the CT scan on Thursday....GGRRRRRrrrrr!!?!

So, YES, I am really f****ing pissed off at the moment....I hate incompetence.

Okay, me: Breathe out....rant over.

4 December 2009

Thank you!....Over the top award

I've been given this 'Over the Top' award from the very lovely Chic Mama Go check out her blog, its honesty & humour will have you both shouting in outrage & laughing out loud.

I have to answer 20 questions about myself then pass it on, so here goes:

1) Your Hair

Long, dark brown, very curly...very unruly!

2)Your favourite food
All things Italian.

3)Your dream from last night
I didn't have one that I can remember.

4)Your favourite drink
Tea..Tea then more Tea..

5)What room are you in?
Living/dining room.

6)What is your hobby?
Art, in all sorts of forms.

7)What is your fear?

8)Where do you want to be in six years time?

9)Where were you last night?
At home.

10) Muffins?

11) Last thing you did
Visited OH in hospital and drank Tea with him.

12) What are you wearing?
Black leggings, vest top, black cardigan & black suede boots.

13) Your TV in your house?
At the moment its been 'hijacked' by the Teenagers playing x-box games.

14) Vehicle
Toyota Previa...BIG & old.

15) Your favourite store?

16) Your favourite colour?
Black for clothes, white for decor.

17) When was the last time you laughed?
Yesterday afternoon, at OH's sexy DVT socks!!

18) When was the last time you cried?
Yesterday morning....Tears of relief/stress.

19) Your best friend
One I have known since I was 16 years old.

20) Favourite place to eat
A tiny pub in the middle of Brighton called 'The Hop Poles', perfect lunches! Evenings 'Alfrescos' on the seafront. (sorry that's 2)

I now have to pass it on to other deserving blogs, but there's so many to choose from! So I'm going to pass it on to a few that I always enjoy.

Gigi's Ramblings as I think we are on the same wavelength!

Family Affairs for her interesting 'Advent Calendar' solution here

Expat Mum for her contribution on her other blog Ponds Parleys about Thanksgiving & a certain Green bean casserole, and the 'over the top' storm it created, which had me howling with laughter!

Many thanks and over to you now girls......

1 December 2009

Christmas presents, Teenagers & Surreal shopping...

This year I am well and truly stumped on the Christmas present front.

The only, and I do honestly mean THE only, things they've asked for are "A cable for my guitar that plugs straight into my laptop" from my 18 yr old son. Done.

"Twilight, the books" from TD (but I have a feeling her Daddy has sorted that one. I would say 'stolen' but then I did mention it to him. I really must check) and "More RAM for my computer" from my 19 yr old.

My 22 yr old has absolutely no ideas for gifts, but is very clear on what he doesn't want. NO clothes, DVDs or Music. He says "There's nothing I really want" ::help::

Eeekk!....So what on earth am I supposed to buy them for Christmas??

So, I thought I'd try the wandering around, looking for inspiration, type Christmas shopping today. Early. I am notoriously renowned for not leaving the house until the afternoon, unless forcibly ejected, I am lazy, lazy, lazy...I am not a morning person!

But as I had already promised TD a lift to college this morning, for a day trip to The National Portrait Gallery in London with her photography class, I would already be out & about.

By 8.20 I was sitting in a completely deserted multi-storey car park, which held just the one car, mine, and 3 car wash guys, twiddling their thumbs, as, er....there were no cars to wash.

Obviously a tad early then!

Not a problem, a pot of tea & a bacon butty in BHS's cafe occupied me till 9am..yummy! It is quite surreal being in a shopping centre when it's virtually empty, a bit dreamlike. Me & about 6 other people....

I did buy a few things, but seriously, this is the first year ever, that I haven't had a list of things to be ticked off as I shove my way round the stores. No 'must have' items that need reserving, or driving some ridiculous distance to get the last one in stock... It felt very, very odd.

Maybe it's the end of an era for me....so I'm feeling a little sad...ish

It is also the first time I didn't have to 'shove' my way around the stores.
Maybe there's something to be said for this 'early' shopping lark, it was quite pleasant.

But luckily, some things don't change......They may be all 'grown up' now....

.....but they still asked for the family Advent Calendar....YAY! .... Not so sad now...